Can I let you hurt me again?
Will I lose myself once more?
Am I allowing myself to be dragged in only to be used and abused and dumped out unceremoniously?
I want to believe...
That I won't
That you've changed
That I can control my emotions
That time has healed and made me stronger
That distance will not allow me to get sucked in
But I don't know...
If I can control my feelings
Despite the distance
If I cannot allow myself to hope
Even if it's a faint tenuous one
If I can stop myself from obsessing
And start the whole cycle again
Because it would kill me
It's good that there is distance
That I do not see you
Touch you
Hear you
Laugh
It's good that there are only memories
Of the (little) time we spent together
Of your smile
Of your eyes
Because I'd be trying...
To save you
Be your knight in shining armour
To convince you are worthy
To plead for you to give me a chance
To be your one and only
One of these days... dare I hope it?