I feel good, or shall I say, better? Better than in previous day that's for sure. I think something has clicked on the back of my mind that makes it all slightly more bearable.
Amidst it all, the confusion, and the frustration, pain and exhasperation, some good has come insofar as I feel I have made some inroads into adding to my circle of trusted friends. Which really has no connection to what I have been going through, but may, for sure, make it all easier to understand and bear, as little as medicinal power as sharing can have, which to be fair, I think is not so little at all, will make the healing and recovery all that much easier and less painful, and that is only good news.
Funny how certain situations can bring people together, even if for the act of sharing alone. You may know someone for months, weeks or years (not too many yers though :D) and they can still surprise you or change your point of view, or help you where you previously may have thought no help would have been forthcoming.
And so we move one, or shall I say it, I must move on. Which the light that has been lit at the back of my brain has certainly provided. Something which I thought would take much longer to achieve, but the simple fact of the matter is that the middle and common ground must be reached immediately and without delay, if I may to progress without further hurt to others and minimal to myself. I am weird in the way that I like to talk about things and share thoughts and feelings but then I am quite able to close and isolate myself, when awkwardness sets in. It is this that I want to address and will it to go way, consciently or not.
Hence, the cat has met the reality outside of the bag and they were strangers and wary of each other. But the inherent familiarity will make them get acquainted and a new level shall be reached.
But I waffle in metaphors. I am more confident I shall be able to tackle and confront awkward situations head on, besides I am not that young anymore to get away with coyness and timidness. A greater degree of courage and thick skin will be required for the foreseeable feature, however hard and frustrating it may prove to be, I shall I endeavour to get it.