And so it is that today despite previous days resolutions I am faltering.
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Is it because I have nothing to look forward to now?
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Can I resist and stick with my resolutions?
Can I let my brain overrule my feelings?
Can I switch off thoughts and feelings that easily?
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How can I switch off feelings?
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Does it have to be so difficult?
Does it have to be so painful?
Does it have to be so numbing?
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Oh, were it no so difficult!!
I wrote on my facebook page yesterday and indeed the blog that I rather not be in the limbo. But that is too much like accepting that I am not loved, and that trully and seriously hurts... It's all about the big picture and the long-term my brain tells me, but... fuck it's hard!!
Why write this blog
- P
- It is a way of giving my other self, my unconscious and perhaps artistic self, a way of expressing itself, and thereby helping me working things out. It is somewhat cathartic in a positive way. :)
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