Why write this blog

My photo
It is a way of giving my other self, my unconscious and perhaps artistic self, a way of expressing itself, and thereby helping me working things out. It is somewhat cathartic in a positive way. :)

23 October, 2009


That's kind of how I feel. CENSORED  Is that me just being mean? Is that me just being selfish and dramatising problems that probably exist only in my mind and in my heart?

I don't get this indifference. I rather be shouted at and know what somebody feels towards me than indifference. Maybe it's because I'm portuguese, and have latin blood, and we have our emotions too close to the surface so we kind of need to see that in other people. Obviously not everyone, but at least the people we care about.

CENSORED I don't know... I really just don't know... I hate not knowing! That's the worst, I always have had this unquenchable thirst for finding things out and understanding and analysing, not knowing for me is confusing and painful and furstrating.


CENSORED What have I done apart from revealing myself? CENSORED Showing myself? Am I ugly? Repellent?

Sharing really is a delicate business, you expose yourself to somebody else, and hope and trust they will not hurt you. When they do...


Anonymous said...

Talvez ela se esteja a sentir estupida e humilhada por te ter "recusado", por ter apostado tudo na relação com o outro cromo e ter corrido tão mal!
Ou talvez ela não consiga estar contigo porque a tinhas avisado em relação ao tipo e ela ache que vais dizer "I told you so..."!
Ou talvez seja, pura e simplesmente futil!
Ou talvez precise de espaço...!
Ou talvez....

Não gosto de te ver assim...

P said...

hmm, EU também não gosto de me ver assim...